Desperate: Urethra discharge. Which sexually transmitted diseases could it be?
Dear Dr. Dick,
Help! I'm in trouble and I don't know what kind of trouble it is. I've been having some pain and bleeding in my ass. A couple of times I've even shit out some yellowish stuff that looks like pus! I'm usually a top but have been fucked a few times lately--but not hard enough to still be hurting! I'm scared to go to the doctor because it seems serious and I have enough stress in my life. What is it?? What can I do?? I want my old happy butt back!
Desperate
Dear Desperate:
OUCH!! Sorry about "old happy butt." I hope that your obvious sense of humor about this situation means that you aren't feeling as desperate as you claim.
So, what is it or what can you do? Well, from the symptoms you describe, I can't tell you exactly what's going on. However, I can suggest some possibilities.
The first thing that comes to mind is a new type of gonorrhea that is making the rounds in Seattle. Unfortunately, this new strain thrives in butts. So far it occurs mostly among gay and bisexual men who have recently had the good luck of getting butt-funked and the bad luck of getting an ass infection. Now, most gonorrhea does not like to live in rectal neighborhoods. (I used to live in a neighborhood described as an "armpit.") Anyway, this new form of gonorrhea not only likes buttholes, it thinks they're a great place to breed large families. The good news--this kind of gonorrhea is easily treated. It causes no long term problems if it is treated soon.
On the other hand, your butt misery might be caused by other viruses or bacteria. Germs like chlamydia (clah-MID-ee-ah), herpes (HER-peez) or syphillis (SIFF-lis). Or it might be some other kind of run-of-the-mill butt bacteria that grows out of control and causes rectal swelling known as proctitis (prock-TIE-tus). Herpes is the only one of these diseases that is not curable.
Yes, dear Desperate, I do understand about STRESS--especially stress about going to clinics and seeing doctors. When I feel something going on with my body, my first thought is, "Maybe the problem will take care of itself." But most of the time it's still there--nag, nag, nag. Then it gets worse--more pain. then it becomes more stressful. So for peace of mind, go have your less-than-happy butt checked out. Even if your symptoms seem to have gone away, your butt can still have some bad bacteria living there. Besides, if you think the problem is stressful now, think about the idea of adding panty-liners to your wardrobe. Butt infections are nothing to play around with.
I wouldn't be doing my job if I don't ask an obvious question: Where do condoms fit into your butt-play? Was your fuck buddy wearing one that broke? Was he wearing one at all? Remember, even if you are HIV+, it is not good to get new infections. If you are HIV-, a bad butt infection allows HIV even more chances to get into your bloodstream. If you're bored with the rubber selection, check out the great new flavored TRUSTEX (see page __) or the Reality Condom (the one that you stick up your butt--it's fabulous). These new condoms are available at the Capitol Hill and Stonewall needle exchanges and at NEON's Thursday night harm reduction meetings.
BEST PLACES TO GET CHECKED: The STD Clinic at Broadway and Madison (720-4333) or the STD Clinic at Harborview Hospital (731-3590). Take an AmphetaZINE coupon with you and get everything free. Another place to get excellent STD care is the Country Doctor Clinic on 19th and Republican (461-4503).